when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank
they’re married now
THIS IS WORSE THAN THE MUG GIRL
things to say if someone asks why you are so quiet
- "i don’t have much to say"
- (shrug with a smile)
- "i like listening"
- (with clenched teeth) “there are wasps in my mouth”
having a crush is painful and horrible but not having a crush is just so boring
here is 300 gold give me your best magic staff
sir for the last time